Fasten Your Seatbelts: The Rapture Index

Fasten Your Seatbelts: The Rapture Index brings readers up to speed on where the countdown stands. "The Rapture Index, as of this writing, stands at 153. Anything over 145 is labeled by the Rapture Actuaries as "Fasten your seat belts." In other words: Repent for the End Is Near."

But it is not just Iraq, Iran and Russia that enter into the Rapture rap. It's also the environment. "One of George Bush's core constituencies is actively praying for environmental degradation. Its members are in fact praying for the end of the world, because the end of the world is the beginning of the fun part of salvation."

Woo-hoo, the next four years are going to be fun. They're praying for the end of the world, and I'm praying that we all survive W's regime.